It's That Time Again...

Hello everyone!!

I'm finally back with a new blog. One might ask I have a specific reason for it??

-No. Nothing. Pure boredom of the mind and the thought that maybe writing could help me with dealing with the obscure reality...and make me stop wasting time on Facebook and Stumble...time is what you make of it or so (I'm sure I'm confusing idioms here)...
And sometimes life gets so impenetrable in my head that I get a headache and depressed...and maybe writing them down and kickin them out into the wide space of the internet will help...

Well, for the people who followed my other 2 blogs, what has happened since I came back from California??
- Zero. I have been working on my thesis. Yes!!!, the bugger is still not finished and I'm running out of time and soon out of money. Haste makes waste or whatever excuse I can find for lazyness mixed with confusion, fear and loathing...the future freaks me out although I haven't even finished my paper. Idle hands are the tools of the devil, a wise guy has told me not so long ago. So devil, come and get me...
But I'm working...slowly...but steadily (somehow I need to calm myself, no??)

I still play guitar, pretty amateur (because more than 2 fingers are over the top!), but I try to convince myself that Courtney Love was not able to play better and she made at least one great record! (I still lack the help of a musical genius like she had, but my friend Anda has to make up for his)...Das Christkind, the Austrian version of Santa Claus, has brought me a Shure microfone. My brother expected it to work with my Mac - "simply plug it and it's good" - but unfortunately, it doesn't...I need a pre-amp for it and this is a thing I don't want to concern myself with. So I continue to record second-rate demos of songs that all lack a bridge because I'm not able to write one...(so I should probably not try to write any and stop getting frustrated by not being able to do it!?!?)

I live at home since I came back from Rome. I kinda like it. It's in the middle of nowhere, without car or bike you're fucked...but at least the air's nice here. When my mum goes to work and my sister's in school, I have plenty of time for my business...
I guess I'm becoming nerdier and nerdier with everyday of my life in this place. If I don't get out of here soon, I won't go out anymore at all...all the signs are there...I'm wearing my pyjama all day long (there is no better pieace of clothing!!) and a pair of these huge Norwegian wool house shoes,
I wrap myself into blankets, wear my glasses all the time, drink herbal tee, get spots (I'm devolving into a teenager according to the number of the spots I recently had), listen to The Dodos (check them out!!) basically 24/7...it's all there.

But whatever!? I don't care...I don't want a career. I don't want a sucessful life in terms of money or reputation. I don't want a house, a car, a tooth insurance or a famous name. I just wanna be happy. That's all I demand from life. Satisfaction. But I guess this is hard to attain in a society in which everyone just strives for more. Where life is the accumulation of goods and Facebook/Myspace/Twitter friends. Tags on pictures. And networking.
Nevertheless, I'm doing all the same things that everyone does...and as soon as there is some money on my bank account, I go and spend it all...and I post pictures on Facebook so that other people can see them (and comment)...but what for? why do we do this? why has this kind of communication become so important in our lifes? I don't even call some people anymore because I chat to them on Skype...I spend hours on Stumble and look at pictures, videos, blogs, texts, etc...Sometimes I think of 15 things at the same time...But isn't this permanent information overload stressful? Sometimes I feel like I don't know anything anymore...nothing real...and that communication with so many people has become fake and superficial and I ask myself why I even have an exchange with people that having nothing to say to me for real...
But yes, smalltalk is a necessary evil...like the period and seeing a dentist.


Ah well, is life difficult!?!? I've tried meditation. It worked when I was in a good mood. When I was nervous or freaking out, no way. I can't get myself to concentrate on my breath and relax. My mind works like an automated factory and I have little control over the hundreds of thoughts that pop up in my mind...someone should invent a pop up blocker for our brains...this would be a neat invention...
Make an effort, you smart computer nerds out there!!


Well, enough useless bullshit for the first time. There's gonna be more anyway. Shitloads. Be prepared!!

As always, you can post comments. You dont need to sign up or anything, just make a guest entry...I appreciate any comments and notes and ideas and insults...whatever you can think of. I also love to receive hate emails. Give me something back for what I give to you...this is how it works...
Thanks a lot for your attention...
Good night and good luck...

PS: This time there will be a song recommandation with a Youtube link after every entry....because music is the fuel of life. And if you really wanna follow this blog, you better check them out, biatches...To start with I decided to go for a classic, The Clash's 'Career Opportunities' (click me!!)
"Every job they offer you is to keep you out the dock"...remember this...